Do you have someone you can just be yourself with? Do you have someone who will listen to your pain? Do you have someone you can count on regardless of the mood you're in? I do.
I remember when my mom passed away. I didn't have too much of a reaction (sort of, at the time anyway) and I decided that things would go on as normal. Well my friend Y thought differently, and she and her husband J came to sit with me. I remember feeling awkward at the attention, awkward that anyone would be here specifically to offer comfort and sustenance to me. Just to me. When you grow up with narcissistic parents that sort of a thing is hard to wrap your head around.
And I know how to be there for her. She struggles with her addicted son, understands lately her role in that, is able to talk about it, cry at her sad position, recognize her piece in this, and keep talking to me. I have the ability to listen, offer comfort, offer reality, truth, and love. It's an interesting combination, one that amounts to something called friendship.
I love Y... she is very dear to me and the nights we get together and love each other, and break bread, and help each other through.. are what friendship, and life, are all about to me.
Thanks Y. I love you a ton.